Oops
by Nesloga
Summary: Well... This is awkward... And it isn't Zelos's fault! So he says... Zelloyd..


_Disclaimer: I do not and never will own Tales of Symphonia, I do not make any profit from this story and no Teddy Bears were hurt in the making of this tale._

_AN: Ummmm... I don't really have anything to say except that this fic is complete and utter Crack. It's not meant to be taken seriously and I know that the 'angels' are not under Ratatosk's domain of power. It just makes the story more funny and I needed a way to make Lloyd get his new found ability.  
_

_Word Count: 966_

_Summary: Well... This is __awkward... And it isn't Zelos's fault! So he says...  
_

Oops

Lilac eyes stared into maroon eyes, maroon eyes stared back. All was quiet, all was tense…. All was drenched in an awkward silence.

"So, um, I'd like to have, you know. Your, uh, blessing?" Lilac eyes begged maroon eyes to understand and –hopefully- forgive. "Because, I guess, with what's happened. You know, the thing with Llo-" A growl ripped through the apprehensive atmosphere like a knife through paper. "Okay. So, um, no saying his name. I get it. I really do. But. I'd still like your, uh, blessing. To, you know, get married."

Zelos stared at his –not yet- father in law in silent fear, he was the Great and Marvelous _and_ let's not forget Drop Dead Sexy Zelos Wilder but he still feared the man in front of him. He'd seen the pictures, he knows what the man that he was currently facing had done to those poor innocent Teddy Bears. The stuffing _oh _the stuffing. It was everywhere! Ragged cloth limbs strewn across the photo, bow ties ripped off without mercy, and black button eyes crushed into dust. So yes, he knew to fear the power of the Seraphim, particularly this Seraphim. "So, um, what do you say?"

A few more moments of silence passed between the two angels, nerve racking silence that had Zelos fidgeting ever so slightly under the cool gaze of Kratos. "How. Did. This. Happen?" Kratos took a deep breath after gritting out his question, it was taking everything he had to not jump over the table, take out his beloved sword, and run Zelos through with it.

"Well…. Uh… When two people really love each other the-"

"I'm not talking about the sex!" Zelos scooted back a bit, maybe being a smart ass hadn't been the best course of action for once. "I'm talking about how the hell you got _Lloyd_, who is a _male_, pregnant!"

"Ooooohh… That… Well, the way that it was explained to me is that Ratarosk is one vindictive bastard." Zelos nodded with his statement, yep, Rataosk really was a bastard at times. He didn't need to do this to Lloyd! Just because he, the Marvelous Zelos, made fun of that brat Emil sometimes…. It didn't mean that Ratatosk had to do _this_ to Lloyd!

As Zelos mentally ranted Kratos stared at the red head in front of him. On one hand he could slice Zelos to pieces for even touching Lloyd, on the other hand he could postpone Zelos's demise to find out what happened and if it would be possible to reverse what had happened….. It was a difficult decision… But a decision was made in the end; let's just say that Zelos should feel very lucky that Kratos had an appointment to destroy more Teddy Bears –those freaks of nature-.

Zelos continued to ponder and rant at the evilness of Ratatosk and how Emil should toughen up and be manlier if he didn't want to get teased left and right. But, his thoughts were brought to an abrupt stop when Kratos resettled his icy gaze upon the Chosen. "Zelos, how in the name of all that is holy did Ratatosk have _anything_ to do with _Llyod_, who is a _male_, getting pregnant?"

"Well you see….. Um that is… Uh, you know how Ratatosk controls monsters and the like?" A quick and impatient nod was the curt reply. "Apparently you guys, me and Colette included, are classified as 'monsters'." At Kratos's blank and more then scary look that promised death if Zelos didn't explain himself in five seconds, did the red head hastily blurt out the rest of his explanation. "It has to do with the whole being 'angels' thing. There was a big clarification with a chart and everything the other day. But, the main point is that even though Lloyd is protected from Ratatosk's influence by Martel. Ratatosk still had enough power over Lloyd who is apparently a monster, as previously stated, to make it so he could get pregnant."

"And why would Ratatosk want Lloyd to have the ability to carry children?" Kratos slowly caressed his sword, Zelos watching all the while; flinching every time the older angel completely grasped the hilt of the dangerous, and let's not forget sharp, sword.

"You see…. I might have teased Emil about being so femine that he might as well of been a girl…. And Ratatosk might have taken offense to that… And he might have decided to take his revenge out on Lloyd…. Who might have eaten some weird fruit that Ratatosk gave him…"

Zelos smiled a rather innocent smile for someone in his position as he waited to see how Kratos would react. He waited a whole twenty seconds –a new record for him- before breaking the silence with careless words. "So, do I have your blessing to marry Lloyd?"

"….Um…. Kratos? You can put that away, there's no need to get violent! Not the face! Not the face! Lloyd? Help! Don't kill me! Erahhh!"

An enraged Kratos looked down at his pitiful prey with a vicious smile slashing across his face. Oh, he wouldn't kill Zelos. He'd leave Zelos alive to handle a pregnant Lloyd and the little brat that was going to be his grandchild. If Lloyd was anything like his mother while being pregnant then Zelos would _feel_ the pain. And if their kid was even a fraction of the trouble magnet that Lloyd was as a child then Zelos would defiantly be left with mental scars for years. Oh yes, this was an even better torture. Let the idiot tend to a pregnant Lloyd and a crying child! _Ha_! Take that Teddy Bears!


End file.
